Whoever lives across the alley from me seemingly washes a lot of dishes. I go outside at Noon, I hear water running and dishes clanging. I go outside at 10 pm, I hear water running and dishes clanging. I go outside at 2 am, I hear water running and dishes clanging. This has led to me developing a few theories as to what it is my neighbor is doing.
1) This person eats upwards of 10 meals a day, requiring them to do dishes on a hyper-regular basis.
2) This person has a back log of dirty dishes from the last 5 years that they are just now getting around to cleaning.
3) This person has OCD and can never get their dishes clean enough.
4) This person has some sort of Ferris Beuller type contraption rigged to my door where everytime it opens, it triggers a series of pulleys and levers inside their kitchen which gives the appearance of someone cleaning dishes.
5) This person is being held captive and cleans dishes all day hoping someone will notice what an odd practice that is and will become suspicious prompting them to contact the police, leading to said person’s rescue.
6) This person isn’t actually cleaning dishes. They’re just listening to a new Bjork song on repeat, and I have mistaken Bjork’s new experimental sound with the sound of running water and clanging dishes.
I’m betting on #6. “ClangClang CleanClean” is her best album in years.